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Obama: Urh,
lady, you make me blush ... 'cause I wasn't trained to
be your math teacher but a lawyer settling disputes with
friends and foes. Don't be so cynical about my peace prize.
Regardless how many kids I might kill today, I'll keep
my peace prize, since it is my peace price, the price to
become major shareholder of peace: high risk for high returns,
the cost is human lives, the lives of your sons and our
enemy's daughters. Trust me, your business is in safe hands.
Now, take a moment to
look at this little toy, which is the hottest export item
at the moment that saves hundreds of jobs for your kids
once they return safely from Libya, Iraq and Afghanistan
before, hopefully, 2018.
In case you know nothing about fascinating WMD,
please allow me to explain it to you. This is called Joint
Direct Attack Munition (JDAM) bomb, which is used to target
surface threats. It explodes, in a spectacular fashion,
and kills, on a massive scale - that helps reducing population
pressure and energy consumption effectively!
Those pathetic weapons
proliferation watchdogs expected the volume of weapons
exports to decline under my presidency. They can keep dreaming
on! I can proudly say, that the reverse has happened. I'm
proven to be a competent president of the United States
for all people in the world.
Let me again brief you
on this biggest arms sale deal in recent memory:
This time last year, Boeing's
F-15 production line was on the verge of shutting down.
The F-15 is an old jet, first designed in the 1970s to
outmaneuver Soviet MiGs. It has long been surpassed by
more advanced rivals, and the U.S. military hasn't bought
a new one since 2001. When production slowed to a trickle
a few years ago, a pair of orders from South Korea (our
dear UN lap dog's hometown) and Singapore kept the line
alive, but just barely. Local politicians even fretted
that Boeing would have to close the production line, eliminating
hundreds of jobs and delivering a blow to the struggling
regional economy. But I didn't lose my heart. I kept my
vision alive because I had a dream in my mind.
Then, last summer, my
dream became true. A buyer ordered massive ... 84 planes,
boy, with an arms package worth some $60 billion - $60
billion, man! Wanna know who this mysterious buyer is?
Well, I can tell you, but you should not tell anyone else,
all right? ... He is a rich man, ultra rich ... a powerful
monarch, very powerful ... who just accomplished a military
mission in a neighbouring country by helping crackdown
a pro-democracy protest ... This time I did not send warplanes
over to kill the undesirable local population, so as you
can see, I'm not an indiscriminate killer ... of kids,
because I respect human rights and love peace. By the way,
you can find more details on our arm's trading business
at money.cnn.com.
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