Multiple
Texts > World Watch
26 May 2010
By Admin
Uncle O!Ba-Ma Cuddles His
Adopted Nephew
干侄:
干叔, 抱抱!
干叔:
好啦好啦, 玩去吧, 乖!
Lee: Uncle,
my brother brutalized me.
O!bama:
Don't cry my baby, tell uncle what
happened?
Lee: Hum
.. I think he sneaked out of his
north-facing room and played his flying
disc game in the balcony and knocked off
my toy warship which fell to the ground
through the gaps in balustrades and
smashed into pieces, without my notice
... left me with no evidence ... I have
no real evidence ...
O!bama:
Ok, ok, I'll punish him for you, which is
why I'm here living in your master
bedroom for. Don't worry about the
evidence, we Americans are creative and
inventive people.
Lee:
I know, and me too, uncle!
Barake:
Yes, I've noticed. You did well, and did
well. Reinventing history is a way to go
for history-lacking get-rich-sudden
families like yours and mine.
Lee:
Uncle, I want you to kill my brother so I
can take his room and have the balcony
all for myself.
O!bama: You are
hopeless. Like what I've told you
millions of times before, you must focus
on a bigger picture. Our target is your
neighbour, the family who owns that huge
heritage mansion. Those people are the
friends of your brother, and our plan is
to destroy their history through false
claims made by you and by Manchurians; to destroy their
civilisation by luring them to desert
their own culture through propagandas
generated by CIA-trained democracy
fighters;
to destroy their economy by coaxing them to lend
money to me and fully open their market to my garage sales
through U.S. foundation-supported
advisers;
to destroy their population by
eradicating their native crops and
imposing Han-Chinese only one-child
policy
through their Monsanto-associated GM biologists and the five-member
Family Planning Commission which are
mainly consisted of Manchurians and
Korean. Once we've pulled down your
neighbour's mansion and drive them into
extinction, no one can stop you from
taking over your brother's room and to
claim your neighbour’s heritage,
tangible or intangible, as your own.
Lee:
Then what's for you, Uncle? I understand
you never offer anyone free lunch.
O!bama: That's
right. I'll convert that site into an
amusement park to make money and into a rubbish dumping ground to keep my own house
clean.
Lee:
But how long I'll have to wait to see
that day coming?
O!bama:
Won't take too long, as long as you get
yourself re-elected and keep inviting me
to stay in your home and foot 60 percent
of my bills.
Lee: But
I'm not a popular guy, what if I don't
get re-elected?
O!bama:
Well, there is no lid covering the
Pacific Ocean, isn't it? Take a plug to
visit the sailors who were killed either
by you or by me or by your brother or by
aliens. Got?
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A Fengshui
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