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2010, the Year to Beat Tiger
武二爷上山打虎

5 February 2010
 

Bar keeper: Sir, if you take more than three bowls of alcohol, you must not advance your journey through Mt Jingyang.

Wu Song: Why?

Bar keeper: Didn't you read the notice posted on walls? Mt Jingyang is currently ruled by a man-eating beast who has its military bases all over the mountain.

Wu Song: So? I'm just a passenger. Why should it pick a fight with me? Nuts? (leaves the restaurant after emptied his 18th bowl of rice wine)

Tiger (leaps out of the bush): Hi, dare you hack into my network!

Wu Song (baffling): What? Where is your network?

Tiger (fuming): Each rock in the mountain is a cell in my network, don't you understand!

Wu Song (jumps off the rock): Sorry about that. (picks up his club)

Tiger (springs forward): Are you out of your mind? You never informed me you've developed a weapon! You are the biggest threat to the mountain peace!

Wu Song (dodges aside): No offence. It's just for self-defence.

Tiger (shouting): Shut up! I'm the only one here allowed to develop, trade and use weapons, hear that?

Wu Song: Ok, calm down, I'm leaving the mountain with my club ....

Tiger (pounces forward while snarling): You really think you can do that? Now, you may like to know, I'm hungry and I need to borrow some fleshes and blood from you, or I'll be restless and can't live at peace with humans although as a beast I would love to respect human's rights ...

Wu Song (erupts): Enough of your nuisance! No more craps, come here, try me, hie! You are just a no-two no-three, no-three no-four paper tiger, I'll give you some colour to see see! We'll find out who pa who, tche!

2012, the year of dragon ....

(Image Source: 刘继卣)

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